On July 3, my wife’s only brother died suddenly while we were all vacationing together as a family in the Rockies. He leaves behind his wife Annie and his three boys Jackson (19), Josiah (17), and Ethan (now 14). We still don’t know the cause of death, though we hope to in coming weeks. But for now, I wanted to share my eulogy from his memorial service. Because Charles Heck was truly a special man.

Early Years

Charles Edward Heck was named after two pastors: Charles Spurgeon and Jonathan Edwards. He was due to be born on December 25, 1976. But he didn’t arrive until January 25, 1977. But baby Charles made up for his late arrival by sleeping through the night at two weeks old there in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Then three years later, his sister Cindi was born.

Charles was a great older brother—except that he was a complete jerk who lied all the time, blamed Cindi for things he did, tore the heads off her Barbies, and once punched her directly in the face just to see what it felt like.

But that’s not the Charles we all know. Because the gospel doesn’t leave us as we are. In high school, Charles’ youth group attended a Dawson McAllister conference. Charles was convicted of his sins, the Holy Spirit regenerated him, he trusted in Jesus Christ, and he was transformed. At sixteen, he wrote Cindi a letter apologizing for how he’d treated her. He also gave her a Bible. And he never treated her that way again. Charles Edward Heck was a new creation.

The Master’s College

Soon he enrolled at The Master’s College near L.A. as a Bible Exposition major. There God placed him in Slight Dormitory, where he was a friend magnet. By his junior year, Charles’ 6-man dorm room, Slight 11, was known across campus. And that’s when I met Charles.

I was a 16-year-old new Christian on a 3-day visit to Master’s, and I stayed in Charles’ room. That weekend, he instantly brought me into his circle of friends. I remember laughing till my face hurt at 1:30 a.m. in his dorm room hanging out with the guys on his wing. I remember going out to eat with his friends—a well-balanced group with both guys and girls—and being amazed at how welcomed I felt.

That fall, I too enrolled at Master’s. It was Charles’ senior year, and I got to be one of his roommates. As a lowly freshman, I watched from my top bunk as this senior RA woke up at 6:00 a.m. every single morning to read his Bible at his desk. I watched him study for his Daniel and Revelation class. That year, he was one of three Bible majors selected to preach to his fellow students in a chapel series called SpurgeonFest. Even as a young man, Charles was serious about the Lord, and clearly gifted by God.

Fun and Traditions

But we all know that Charles was never all business. He was balanced. Charles could make anything fun, and he did. And Charles loved traditions. The year we roomed together, every Tuesday and Thursday we played one game of NCAA 1999 college football after class: OU vs. OSU, every time. Charles had an ever-growing collection of PEZ dispensers. He started a Hole-in-the-Wall Club visiting local restaurants. His teams were the San Francisco Giants, the San Francisco 49ers, the L.A. Lakers, and most of all, the Oklahoma Sooners, whose jersey he wore anytime he watched a game. And if you drove 10 hours with Charles on a road trip, you would stop 11 times, at every candy store, pie kitchen, or just to see the largest bunny on that particulate interstate, wherever you were.

Of course, if you want to have fun in life, it helps if you’re immune to embarrassment, which Charles was. Like his dad, Charles was unembarrassable. He created embarrassing moments just for fun, because he never took himself seriously. And he could laugh off any awkward moment and keep on going, making him the most pleasant, low-maintenance person in any group he was in.

Charles and Annie

Charles even had a traditional “first date shirt” he would wear on any first date. But those first dates came to an end when he met Andrea Greene. He was smitten with her beautiful smile and her godly character. As their relationship blossomed, Charles spent a summer painting houses in Washington so her family could get to know him. Annie’s dad, a sheriff’s deputy, actually spent that same summer at the FBI Academy, so Charles escaped a summer’s worth of interrogations. But the family knew a Christ-like man when they saw one. And two weeks in, Annie’s nephews and nieces were already calling him “Uncle Charles”—no pressure, Annie! Their love grew, and the deal was sealed on January 5, 2001.

Poor Seminarians

From there, Charles and Annie started out in the infamous “pink apartments” in Santa Clarita, California. Charles was already studying at The Master’s Seminary, his dad’s alma mater. Charles also served as a Bible study leader and deacon at Grace Community Church. As a poor young seminary couple, Charles had to get creative to make ends meet, so he drove a newspaper route and donated platelets, scraping by as they prepared to serve the Lord with their lives.

Youth Pastor and Associate Pastor

After seminary graduation, Charles had wanted to serve alongside his dad Doug. In 2002, that dream was fulfilled as he became Youth Pastor at Grace Bible Church in Tulsa. Two years later, they planted Grace Community Church where Charles served as Associate Pastor for 10 years. There he mowed lawns to make ends meet, and did what an associate pastor does—which is everything.

Along the way came Jackson, Josiah, and Ethan, now 19, 17, and almost 14. Jackson, you have your dad’s thoughtfulness—and his hairiness. Josiah, you have your dad’s spunk and sensitive spirit. Ethan, you have your dad’s intelligence and his unembarrassability. And all of you have his legacy. You had one of the best dads I’ve ever known. Remember him, follow his example, and you’ll be on the right path.

Wichita Bible Church

Charles served with his own dad for almost 12 years. But a young man has to be his own man at some point. And in 2014, God called Charles to become Teaching Pastor to half the people in this room at Wichita Bible Church. I don’t have to tell you about his ministry here, because sheep know their shepherd. You know Charles was a real pastor. He taught you books of the Bible, got to know your family, talked with your kids, took you to lunch, welcomed you into his home, visited you in the hospital, and counseled you when you were struggling.

Charles didn’t have a ladder-climbing bone in his body. No illusions of grandeur. No celebrity attitude. Just a humble shepherd who smelled like his sheep because he was around. Charles even held a regular “Donuts with Pastor Charles” for the kids in the church. Parents could sign their kids up to come to the church before school and have donuts in his office as a group. Peek in his office and you’ll find walls of books, like any good pastor’s office—and also lots of drawings from kids who loved him. It fills my heart with joy to know that when the kids in this church hear the word “pastor,” they think of Pastor Charles.

But Charles wasn’t just a people person. Like his mom Susan and his dad Doug, he had a voracious hunger for God’s word, for good theology, for Christian wisdom. He was a disciplined and diverse reader with an organized library and a list of books to read 9 months out. Over his life, Charles taught parts of Deuteronomy, Romans, and 1 John, and all of Ruth, the 150 Psalms, Daniel, Jonah, Micah, Habakkuk, Haggai, Matthew, John, 1–2 Corinthians, Ephesians, 1–2 Thessalonians, and many other helpful topics. When he died 10 days ago, Charles had just started Ecclesiastes. His last verse was Ecclesiastes 1:11: “There is no remembrance of former things, nor will there be any remembrance of later things yet to be among those who come after.”

Since his dad died three years ago, Charles had felt the brevity of life, the weight of human transience. He knew life was short, and should be lived for Christ. But none of us knew how short—except for God, who graciously numbers our days (Ps 139:16). And if his days were already numbered, we can say with confidence that Charles’ days weren’t short. His days were full.

Charles’ Departure

And so it was that on the morning of July 3, 2024, in the Summit Cabin at Tarryall River Ranch in Lake George, Colorado, our husband, father, son, brother, uncle, friend, and pastor entered the presence of Christ. It’s so confusing, and so hard, but the truth is this: Our heavenly Father simply brought Charles home.

Before him now is the face of Christ whom he loved, served, and preached. Behind him on earth is a trail of discipled believers and special memories and well-loved family and friends. But most of all, what Charles leaves behind is a witness. Like his mom and dad, Charles loved God’s word. Like his mom and dad, Charles loved people. And those are two things that last forever—the word of God and the souls of men.

Well done, my brother. Well done.